autumnluv143

My life is still doing 80 in the slow lane with me hanging onto the bumper. And yes, I'm still here. I've actually started to read LJ again, not just ignore it. I think much of that has to do with the fact that I miss everyone. At least being on LJ gives me a taste of what I've been missing. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like my life slows down anytime soon. I'm just hoping I can catch up with it if I pick up the pace a little.

So here are the updates. My mom went back into the hospital last weekend and stayed 4 days. It was the blackouts again. The cardiac specialist that saw her (once) thinks that it's neurological. Her pcp and the cardiologist both think it's cardiac. They still don't know what's wrong for sure, but they let her go home. They are going to try to work on her meds and treat with that to (I'm guessing) weed out the problems. They also changed her pain meds to oxycontin without the tylenol. This is good and bad. Good because she can take it, have it actually cut out the pain and the tylenol isn't eating away the already thin lining of her 5oz stomach. It's bad because she's going to develop an immunity to the effectiveness of this too because of the dependency she has on them. With the good comes the bad I guess. Let's just hope her heart is fine enough for her to have the knees replaced at the end of the school year.

School: I am still in it? Yeah, I am still not doing as well as I would like to, but better than last semester. I only have 1 F. I could just slap myself. I know that I know the stupid math. But by not reviewing the shit and not applying myself to the work, I'm failing the class. The stuff I did review, when I got to it on the test, I got them all right. It was the other shit I couldn't make a guess for. So I'm spending tonight and most of tomorrow reviewing it so that I can turn in all of my assignments from here on out. Hopefully I can scrape by with a D. We'll see.

Work: I'm liking my job at the park less because it's become more of a hassle to get there on time...or even get there at all for that matter. I feel badly about my attendance, but not so badly that I'm willing to do much about it. My other job isn't physically strenuous, but it does take a lot out of me. I have to live up to this standard they've set because they believe I can do anything. It's a great feeling to have bosses that feel that way, but I'm struggling to keep up with it and no help. There is still so much of the University that is unwilling to give support to a "cartoon." That is so frustrating when you consider all of the possible applications that Second Life can be used for in the classroom. And it's sooo much better of a distance learning aid than Blackboard is. My Second Life course (English 2238) is the only class I currently have an A in. Other than that, I set up a college fair booth for UNO in SL over this weekend and I was really quite impressed with it. And I came in 12 prims lower than the 50 prim limit they gave all the schools. And mine looked so much better than a lot of the ones that were there (I love patting myself on the back).

Side note: I received an ineresting comment on one of my older entries the other night. It was the entry about the dream I had of me being back in Colorado. The comment was an apology from Shi. I've missed her and she's the only person ever who has known me to the depth that she did....but...I've lived for 10 months without sharing with her. And my life is different. I still love her. I am talking to her. She suggested that she be the one to call me and not the other way around and I agreed. She said it was her turn to chase the frienship down since I did it for so long. I agree with that too. So I still won't be calling her. I haven't even saved her number in my phone for that reason. She'll just have to remember. I guess we'll see if we can be close like we were again. I really hope we are able to overcome this. I just think it's going to take some time for me to get the hurt out of my system.

Ok, I think I've stalled enough. I guess I'll go back to my algebra review-or-die session.