Ruining Myself

I'm both amused and very disappointed in myself at times. I research too much. I spend too much time trying to figure out what's going on and where and who...etc that I refused to just let things be. This realization a moment ago when I went looking for something I knew I could find (and did) that I just didn't need to know. I did the same thing last night.

First thing? I as looking around LJ and found out that I don't know everything and see everything when it comes to certain people. I didn't need to know that. I should be happy seeing the things I see now. I don't need to over-investigate. 

Second thing was on collarme last night. I suddenly realized that there is a button that allows you to see who has viewed your profile recently. I really didn't need to know that. Alot. A) The number of people in ratio to the number of messages I've gotten is scary and pitiful. B) On the other hand, I shouldn't complain because half the people that saw my profile and didn't respond to me are really not people that I would deal with/speak to to begin with.

Side note: I'm really disappointed about not being able to go to the seminar on the 18th. Definitely not the first one and maybe not the second one. It depends on how long the professor keeps us. If she keeps us the entire block, I won't get out of NO until 2:40. Oh well...at least I'll still have the party. And I most definitely will be there. Too much to look forward to and now that I've gotten myself out of my house for last weekend, I'm not allowing myself to crawl back inside. 

Side note 2: I went to the Dr. today. He gave me several suggestions as to what kind of diets would suit me. The two he kept coming back to were grazing and Weight Watchers. My best friend wants to do WW too so I'm thinking that might be the direction I'm going in. He also said that I need to exercise and access to a pool. He suggested a gym membership. I'm only opposed to that because of the contract I'd need to sign...but I might as well look into it. He said that with my medical conditions (ie, weight, hormones, back problems and possibility of diabetes), the membership and weight loss program would both be tax deductible. Gotta love the man who doesn't want to give me drugs and kick me out of his office and is always looking for a silver lining. So, now I have goals. Small goals at first.

As far as the diabetes thing goes, he explained what I already knew about PCOS, that it reacts the same way that Type 2 diabetes does to insulin. He said that the last time my blood sugar was taken was in 2002 and it was 113. So he put me on a hormone regulator for diabetics that may help with all the main issues I have. I guess we'll see. Like I said before and I haven't changed my mind...I'm quite determined to lose both the weight I've added since moving back and the weight I'd tacked on since 2001. Wave bye-bye fat, it may be a long journey, but you're outta here!

Goal #1: Find a regular exercise routine and put it into action.
Goal #2: Lose 10lbs (baby steps).

Anyone Interested?

 

 

I'm game if anyone else is, but let me know by Saturday afternoon.

( Pelicanpalooza )