Rollercoaster

[autumnluv143]

Today is an emotional rollercoaster. I started the day feeling good. Tonight is a party and I'm going to play happy welcome wagon. Tomorrow is my first munch (the ones I'm hosting). And next weekend I'm going to Kansas and will see some of my family for the first time in months.

I spoke to my girl today and she made me feel loved and special and I miss her greatly. I try not to think about her and what could have been much because it would make settling in here, so far away, so much harder. I can't wait until May when I can see her again. I can't wait to be able to adore her and feel her adoration for me. Hopefully I will be able to beat her soundly while I'm there (hehe). Once she gains a certain amount of respect for you she gives of herself totally and that's what every Dominant should seek in a submissive. She broke all my rules of what I thought I wanted from this lifestyle.

I love you, my girl.

My love to everyone back home. I will see you all in May.

Comments

Is there an Ideal anything?

[his-sweet.livejournal.com]

i find myself speechless. How can i say what i feel? She breaks all the ideas i have ever had about a dominant. Dominants are men?? Dominants are older than me??? Dominants are those that want you on your knees and are harsh and cruel??? Fantasies are sometimes very hard to shake.....the last was easy enough, but a female ?? younger than myself?? i found myself drawn to her. Watching her, listening, and taking in as much as i could. Only when i realized she was leaving. When i would not see her for a long time, i wanted to give her something she would not forget, but more than that. i wanted to give her something she could not get from anyone else, no store would carry it, no money could buy it. i would give to her what i have never given to another woman ever. i asked her to please consider topping me. i waited because i was not sure what her reaction would be. i was anxious, scared, nervous, and excited when she said yes. At times my mind wanders over what might have been, but i seize it back quickly. She is the one and only woman i have ever truly seen in this light. Not from fear or intimidation, but because she loves me, i respect her, and i love her. She captured more than my attention she captured my heart. i can not wait for the day when she comes home, she will be welcomed, served, and treated as the Lady she is.

you are loved very much

your girl