Blank Rant
Mar. 4th, 2008 07:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
autumnluv143I feel the need to rant but I don't have anything specific to rant about so I'm going to start and then just go...
I guess the easiest way is to just start typing. I decided not to go to work today because I have so much to catch up with in school. It was a good reason and good decision....or at least it would have been. I sat around for a couple of hours chatting and running around the net. Then some friends were going to eat sushi and "dragged" me to go along with them. I went, we had fun. Ok. So now I'm back at school, I pull up the Chem homework website and I'm 2 assignments behind. Chapter 4 homework was due around the 18th of Feb and Chapter 5 was due on the 2nd. I kind of started on one and looked at the other one. Now Chapter 6 is due on the 10th and I'm going to try to do that one first to get the best grade I can and work my way backwards. I'm pretty much fucked at this point anyway.
I did talk to the professor on my way out of class today and was nearly in tears from frustration. I told him that I was still completely lost. So he suggested that I read the chapter, attend the lectures and they may open some doors that way and then read the chapter again. He said to do as much of the outside work as possible to see if that would help out and, lastly to try to get to the tutoring lab and get some real help.
So I'm reading the chapter on the lecture I just heard to see if any of it makes sense. The problem now is my stubborn assed brain is being a jerk-off and has decided that it likes when I completely ignore the fact that problems exist and try to hide in mundane, routine actions that don't require acknowledging that real work needs to be done. I read a paragraph or two and my brain wanders (what do you think I'm doing here, ranting). I know I'm doing this because I don't get it and it's insulting one of my two vanity points (my brain). I know I need to get over it. I'm trying. Admitting that you have a problem (in this case I'm chemically retarded...oh wait...I already knew that) is half the battle, right?
I'll get back to work in a minute. I'm determined not to leave here until at least half of one assignment in chem is done and all of my math homework for tomorrow morning (I may be here awhile..even though what I want to be doing is having fun in SL). As far as work goes, the vice president is in town. This may be the driving factor in my need to be more productive the last few days. Let's hope it's not just that. I was barely in my office yesterday morning when he comes in, drops some papers on my desk and says, "Here's your job. You need to contact these people, get them in here for interviews and make sure they get sent out for a drug screen right away. Coordinate with Neal and Chuck to see when they are available to interview. They need to do it with both of them." Um...ok. I'm not a manager. Why is hiring my responsibility? Ohhhhh, that's right...because my entire job is filling in the spaces where management find themselves too "busy" to do certain things so they turn into "Autumn projects." For the most part, I'm actually ok with that. It keeps me away from net surfing during the work day and also keeps me away from the stupid graphing that has backed up so significantly on my desk that it's impossible to make a dent in it....especially when I get 5 new pages of data per day. So this week will be about ordering supplies needed for breaking machines, getting end of the month paperwork filled out and emailed, trying to make a dent in my graphing, seeing that a special project for the branch manager gets done by the lab, evaluating those results and getting people scheduled for interviews. Yee...haw...
Sex 'n stuff was in the last post so I'm not obsessing about it in this one...
Oh! The dinner incident tonight. So Anne-Marie and Josh, two people I go to school with were going to eat and Anne Marie offered to pay if I'd go. So I go to hang out and we're sitting there talking about sex, lube, drinking, sex, toys, sex, and kinky shit. We're not being offensively loud. I'm sure the tables next to us (not that they were occupied) could hear every word that was said. But the restaurant was basically empty. Well the guy that was at the table that was occupied closest to us turned around once or twice to stare at us and I just ignored him. As he and his prude woman got up to leave, the asshole walks over to our table and is like "You know, I've traveled all over the world and it takes quite a bit to offend me. But we can hear every single word you guys are saying and it's crude. There's a little boy over there that, I'm sure, doesn't need to hear this kind of thing...." I looked at him with a demeaning, amused smile that clearly stated he should leave before I decide to get even more crude. I could feel it welling up in side and I was so very close to saying something to him when he finally decided to leave. What a fucking asshole. It's none of his fucking business if we talk about sex until we're fucking at the table. If we thought the table with the preteen boy could hear us, we would have quieted down. If the father of the boy had come up to us and said something, we would have apologized and quieted down. But no, he didn't. How much of a cock-sucking asshole do you have to be to blame your being offended on a kid who had no idea what was going on? Asshat.
Ok, I got distracted most of the way through this with conversations so I think I'm done ranting. Back to Chemistry.
I guess the easiest way is to just start typing. I decided not to go to work today because I have so much to catch up with in school. It was a good reason and good decision....or at least it would have been. I sat around for a couple of hours chatting and running around the net. Then some friends were going to eat sushi and "dragged" me to go along with them. I went, we had fun. Ok. So now I'm back at school, I pull up the Chem homework website and I'm 2 assignments behind. Chapter 4 homework was due around the 18th of Feb and Chapter 5 was due on the 2nd. I kind of started on one and looked at the other one. Now Chapter 6 is due on the 10th and I'm going to try to do that one first to get the best grade I can and work my way backwards. I'm pretty much fucked at this point anyway.
I did talk to the professor on my way out of class today and was nearly in tears from frustration. I told him that I was still completely lost. So he suggested that I read the chapter, attend the lectures and they may open some doors that way and then read the chapter again. He said to do as much of the outside work as possible to see if that would help out and, lastly to try to get to the tutoring lab and get some real help.
So I'm reading the chapter on the lecture I just heard to see if any of it makes sense. The problem now is my stubborn assed brain is being a jerk-off and has decided that it likes when I completely ignore the fact that problems exist and try to hide in mundane, routine actions that don't require acknowledging that real work needs to be done. I read a paragraph or two and my brain wanders (what do you think I'm doing here, ranting). I know I'm doing this because I don't get it and it's insulting one of my two vanity points (my brain). I know I need to get over it. I'm trying. Admitting that you have a problem (in this case I'm chemically retarded...oh wait...I already knew that) is half the battle, right?
I'll get back to work in a minute. I'm determined not to leave here until at least half of one assignment in chem is done and all of my math homework for tomorrow morning (I may be here awhile..even though what I want to be doing is having fun in SL). As far as work goes, the vice president is in town. This may be the driving factor in my need to be more productive the last few days. Let's hope it's not just that. I was barely in my office yesterday morning when he comes in, drops some papers on my desk and says, "Here's your job. You need to contact these people, get them in here for interviews and make sure they get sent out for a drug screen right away. Coordinate with Neal and Chuck to see when they are available to interview. They need to do it with both of them." Um...ok. I'm not a manager. Why is hiring my responsibility? Ohhhhh, that's right...because my entire job is filling in the spaces where management find themselves too "busy" to do certain things so they turn into "Autumn projects." For the most part, I'm actually ok with that. It keeps me away from net surfing during the work day and also keeps me away from the stupid graphing that has backed up so significantly on my desk that it's impossible to make a dent in it....especially when I get 5 new pages of data per day. So this week will be about ordering supplies needed for breaking machines, getting end of the month paperwork filled out and emailed, trying to make a dent in my graphing, seeing that a special project for the branch manager gets done by the lab, evaluating those results and getting people scheduled for interviews. Yee...haw...
Sex 'n stuff was in the last post so I'm not obsessing about it in this one...
Oh! The dinner incident tonight. So Anne-Marie and Josh, two people I go to school with were going to eat and Anne Marie offered to pay if I'd go. So I go to hang out and we're sitting there talking about sex, lube, drinking, sex, toys, sex, and kinky shit. We're not being offensively loud. I'm sure the tables next to us (not that they were occupied) could hear every word that was said. But the restaurant was basically empty. Well the guy that was at the table that was occupied closest to us turned around once or twice to stare at us and I just ignored him. As he and his prude woman got up to leave, the asshole walks over to our table and is like "You know, I've traveled all over the world and it takes quite a bit to offend me. But we can hear every single word you guys are saying and it's crude. There's a little boy over there that, I'm sure, doesn't need to hear this kind of thing...." I looked at him with a demeaning, amused smile that clearly stated he should leave before I decide to get even more crude. I could feel it welling up in side and I was so very close to saying something to him when he finally decided to leave. What a fucking asshole. It's none of his fucking business if we talk about sex until we're fucking at the table. If we thought the table with the preteen boy could hear us, we would have quieted down. If the father of the boy had come up to us and said something, we would have apologized and quieted down. But no, he didn't. How much of a cock-sucking asshole do you have to be to blame your being offended on a kid who had no idea what was going on? Asshat.
Ok, I got distracted most of the way through this with conversations so I think I'm done ranting. Back to Chemistry.
